Roommate Conflict Tools
Having trouble getting along with your roommate? Need advice on how to resolve issues? Follow these tips on roommate conflicts!
Confronting Your Roommate
If issues arise between roommates, it can sometimes be difficult to communicate with one another. If this is the case, you or your roommate(s) may not know that there is an issue at all. There are ways, however, to know that a roommate has an issue and ways to better deal with those issues that arise.
How to tell there is an issue
- Your roommate(s) may not want to talk to you, may leave as soon as you enter the room, or complain to other friends about you.
- Your roommate(s) may get annoyed with you over little things.
How to address the issue
- Approach your roommate(s) in private.
- Make sure that your roommate(s) have time to talk. If someone in the conversation feels rushed the effectiveness of the conversation may lose its value
- Be direct. Address behavioral issues rather than personality issues. This will help to make your roommate(s) feel less defensive.
- Be patient. Hear your roommate’s point of view.
- Make sure that each person gets a chance to express what they feel the problem is.
- Remember that a solution will most likely involve giving and getting something for each person. While it may not be ideal for you, remember that this solution is helping to make your situation more livable.
Communicating With Your Roommate
Comunication is key in a healthy roommate situation. Most roommate issues are the result of minimal, or in some cases a complete lack of communication.
Tips on communicating with your roommate
- Talk directly to your roommate(s) when something is bothering you. Don’t talk about them behind their back as this can cause a breakdown in trust.
- Be clear about what is bothering you. Your roommate(s) needs to know that there is a problem in order to try and fix it.
- Communication has two parts: talking and listening. Utilizing one without the other will achieve little.
- Evaluate all sides before coming to a solution.
- Get to know each other. Everyone is different and understanding your roommate(s) can make all of the difference.
If you and your roommate(s) cannot come to a solution together, you can always seek the help of your RA. RA’s are trained mediators and can help to see both sides of the story and think of solutions.